I Can't Help It

I am a person you might describe as "self-amusable." I laugh at a lot of stuff, including my own goofiness.

And I can't help but use a little wordplay with certain company names.

Blockbuster? I got it stuck in my head that it's pronounced "Bock Bluster."

Dunkin' Donuts is usually "Drunken Donuts." Or for a fancier drink than coffee, it's got to be Fatty Starbuckles.

Shop and Save and Stop & Shop have been merged into "Stop and Shave." But I get my groceries at Hannaford… oops, that's "CantAfford."

Lumber? Home Despot. Burger King? Either Booger Sling or Murder King. I pronounce Target with a fine, French accent - Tar- ZHAY.

Okay, I'm a dweeb. But at least I'm not dangermouse.
Oops.
Dangerous!